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AHA Community > Connection & Relationships  > Why relationships are essential and why you should invest in them

Why relationships are essential and why you should invest in them

Unless you live on top of the mountain in a cave – which you are not because you have access to internet and are reading this post – no matter what you do, where you are or come from and what you believe in, you are surrounded by people, with whom you establish relationships… from the driver in the car next to you at the stop sign, the lady at the grocery store counter, your neighbour, your colleague from work, to your closest friends, extended family, kids, significant other.


None of your relationships happens without reason, they are a mere reflection of what happens inside of you. Each and every one of them is an opportunity to learn more about yourself and to grow, both for you and the other soul – what a beautiful exchange, don’t you think? Approach a relationship with pure, innocent and genuine curiosity: what are you here to teach me, why have you come into my life and how can we grow together?


Be invested in the relationships in your life, as they all happen with a purpose. Give all your best with an open heart and you will receive ten-fold of what you put in. You might think I am completely removed from reality and crazy, but I am certain l am right. Why? Because everything you’ve ever done with your whole heart in your life has turned out WELL. It’s the same in relationships.


If you feel you are not receiving, you are blocking it somehow through your beliefs, e.g. “I will try again, but I am almost sure I am going to be disappointed, as so many times before”, “people are bad and have hidden intentions”, “I am not worthy of love”, etc. Become aware of your limiting beliefs which impede you from having pure, loving and enriching relationships. If you are not receiving, it means you are not giving fullheartedly. So how about checking your limiting beliefs?


You cannot escape relationships, no matter how hard you try. You will need to interact with other people, may they be your immediate family, your colleagues, the plumber, the customer support officer or the random stranger asking you for directions on the street. Each has potential to either have a positive or a negative impact on your life.


If there is one take-away in this whole article, it’s this one: any relationship can be a source of struggle, suffering, stress and pain OR a source of joy, laughter, support, kindness, positive energy, growth, love. Of course, there many shades in between, but you have the power to move the needle towards the latter side.


So, given that you will have relationships in your life no matter what, why not change them into sources of joy, good, love, etc.? It’s something like “if you can’t beat them, join them”… although it’s far more beautiful and rewarding than that.




No one, deep down, doesn’t want to hurt anyone. Deep down, we are all enlightened beings. You and me, that guy swearing, that woman stealing, that person shouting. All these behaviours (perceived as negative) come from a lack, from something that they feel is missing in their lives, a need that hasn’t been satisfied and they try to satisfy it. Most of the times, that need is love.


I read a beautiful true story of a young man behaving badly in a busy square, bothering other people, being aggressive verbally and physically, putting the ones around him in danger. Then an old woman in a wheelchair approached and touched his hand, looking at him with loving kindness, as if to say ‘you are safe, you are understood, you are loved, you are good, I am here for you.’ The young man suddenly calmed down, his muscles relaxed, his breath deepened and his anger was released, as if he felt at peace, sinking in the compassion and love the old woman had surrounded him with. Honestly now, isn’t this heart-warming?


Love, love, love. The answer to everything. How do you feel when you feel loved, accepted just the way you are, understood at the deepest level? How.Do.You.Feel?


What if you can give this gift to another person, just in way the old women did in the story above? That person will change, your relationship will heal, you will evolve.


As I mentioned in one of my other articles, once you start owning the fact that you can influence a great (great!) deal what is happening to you, you also start taking inspired action towards changing your life, which includes changing your relationships to the better.


So now I am asking you, if any relationship can be a source of good, making your life so much better AND you know you have the power to guide it towards that through your thoughts, attitude, feelings, actions, isn’t it worth it to try? It is a win-win-win situation, for you, the other person, the people in your lives, for the Universe. This, as sublime as it sounds, is at your fingertips, trust me, I’ve experienced it and witnessed it in other people’s lives.



What can we do?


  • Identify a pattern in your relationships, e.g. you always feel like at one point the other person mistreats you and you lose your trust.
  • Choose a relationship where you’ve noticed or anticipate that pattern and want to heal it.
  • Send forgiveness into that relationship: I forgive you, I love you (not necessarily from an intimate point of you, this is love for the Creation or Universe), I accept and understand you. I send compassion and loving kindness. This will calm you down.
  • Give more love to yourself: I fully love and accept myself, I am worthy of love, I am light and love. And breathe. This will lift you up.
  • Observe. In a state of lightness, love and alignment, you will attract people of the same vibration, which will enrich your life and guide you to grow further. Believe me, when I brought myself to a higher vibration, I was baffled by how quickly my current relationships have changed and how different the people I attracted in my life were. Because like attracts like.
  • Repeat. Do this as may times as you feel the need to.



Being in a loving state, will:


  • Significantly improve your current relationships (it sometimes feels like magic)
  • Help you attract new people, with the same high vibration as yourself, which will positively impact your life
  • Free you of relationships that don’t serve you in the most natural way, like you’ve lifted above the cloud and can see the clear sky again.


You can start anytime. How about now? Close your eyes, breathe deeply, relax you body and send love, compassion, kindness, blessings, acceptance and understanding and FORGIVENESS to the other person, send love to yourself and feel the light and wisdom that is already within you.


Enjoy the feelings of lightness that just wrapped your body.


Do this as many times as you feel the need to. This will also inspire your actions, as they will come from a place of love.


You have the power to change any relationship, from struggle to feeling safe, from suffering you joy, from anger to kindness, from hate to love.


So, what is your immediate next step?

Diana Firican

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